Something Happened, I wasn't Expecting...

March 8, 2019

 A few weeks ago, God told me to write letters to my parents, asking for their forgiveness, and telling them that I forgive them.

 

Although I told myself that I had no expectations as far as a response goes, I really did.

 

(Transparency) I wanted my parents to tell me all was well and agree to build a relationship with me.

 

I, low key, wanted a letter explaining WHY they left and NEVER consistently been around since.

 

I wanted the little girl in me to experience a REAL mother/daughter, father/daughter relationship.

 

I wanted a new closeness...a new bond. A new trust. I was expecting something new between us....

 

Here’s what I received instead; FREEDOM!!

 

I’ve really been holding on to hate concerning them. All that I wanted in return sounded so good...but it came from a BITTER place, a HURT place.

 

I was seeking healing from people who COULDN'T give it to me.

 

What I actually received from my father was an apology.

 

My mother TRIED to take advantage of my vulnerability, which could’ve pulled me several steps back, BUT GOD!

 

As I sit here, listening to my pastor speak, it dawned on me that all God really wanted to do for His daughter was FREE her!!

 

I’ve NEVER had a glow like I do now. I’ve NEVER been at peace about the relationship with my parents as I am now.

 

Trusting God in that process {oh what a process it was} encouraged me to TRUST Him in EVERY area of my life.

 

Although I CRIED like the broken girl that I WAS when my mother tried me, I felt a HUGE weight lifted right AFTER the weeping.

 

 

I’ve NEVER allowed myself to express the pain I held on to concerning my mother.

 

He gave me the opportunity to be FREE from all of the pain, all of the HURT, all of the HATE...FREE INDEED!!

 

We THINK we know how the Holy Spirit operates...when all we REALLY know is that EVERYTHING He takes us through is destined to work out for our GOOD.

 

I’ve learned to shift my expectations when it comes to doing what God tells me to do.

 

To take away my agenda, because we have HIDDEN agendas, when all HE wants is for me to follow HIS instructions.

 

He’s strategic in His works. I wasn’t expecting FREEDOM, but I’m so glad it was in HIS intentions!

 

 

About the Writer: Lanicia Love

 

There is a level of freedom God wants us to experience. In my case, I believe that sharing my truth will not only help expose the commonality of it, but also show that there’s absolutely nothing that can occur in life, that may be intended to keep you bound, or you can’t be free from. Freedom starts with a choice, trusting God, and ends up being a lifestyle, Faith in God! This was not an easy task for me to accept, but nothing WORTH DOING is easy! I just pray that God is glorified and someone is encouraged! My name is Lanicia Love, and FREEDOM is my TRUTH and my WHY!


Keep up with Lancia by following her on Social Media! 

 

Facebook:   Lanicia Love

Instagram: @_nici__love

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